The Ones Who Push Back
Most people, when they learn about your weight loss journey, are supportive. But not everyone is. And the ones who are not can be surprisingly wearing, even when you know intellectually that their opinion has no bearing on your choices or your results. We have both encountered this, and it is worth thinking through before it happens to you.
The Easy Way Out
If you are open about having had surgery, at some point someone will suggest – directly or obliquely – that you took the easy way out. That you should have just eaten less and moved more. That surgery is cheating somehow.
It is worth having a response ready, not because you owe anyone a defence, but because having thought it through means you are less likely to be derailed by it in the moment. The short answer is that gastric sleeve surgery is a major surgical procedure with real risks, a significant recovery, and permanent lifestyle changes required to maintain results. James had an adverse reaction to the anaesthetic on the day that required management in theatre. The first year post-op involves daily discipline around eating, supplementation, and exercise that most people who use the phrase “easy way out” have not considered. The reading simply does not survive contact with the actual experience.
The Disbelief
A related phenomenon is people who simply do not believe the weight loss is real, or who attribute it to something else. Some people will insist the change is not as dramatic as it is. Others will find alternative explanations – stress, illness, some other factor – rather than accept the surgery as the cause.
This is less hostile than the “easy way out” comment but in some ways more disorienting. When someone looks at a transformation you have worked hard for and responds with scepticism, it can feel invalidating even when you know the facts of your own experience perfectly well.
How We Handle It
Two years on, we are both more settled in our own experience than we were in the early months when these comments stung more. The things that helped us get there: keeping our focus on the health outcomes rather than the appearance outcomes, which are harder to dismiss; talking to other people who have been through bariatric surgery, who understand the reality without needing it explained; and simply spending less time trying to convince people who have already decided what they think.
You are not obligated to justify your medical decisions to anyone. Having a short, confident response and then changing the subject is a completely reasonable approach.
Sources
British Psychological Society – Psychological aspects of obesity and weight loss surgery
Sarwer DB and Wadden TA – Behavioural aspects of obesity and bariatric surgery (Obesity, 2019)
NHS – Weight loss surgery: what to expect afterwards
About this content
This blog is written by James and Kirsten, a couple from the UK who had gastric sleeve surgery together in March 2024.
We started this blog because we couldn't find any sources of content that details before surgery, the surgery and then life post surgery - so we decided to write one ourselves.
Everything on this site is based on our own experience and the research we have done along the way. It is not medical advice. Gastric sleeve surgery is a serious procedure and every patient's journey is different. Please always consult your own bariatric team or GP before making any decisions about your health or treatment.
Some posts on this site may contain featured or sponsored content, or affiliate links. Where this is the case, it will always be clearly stated at the top of the article. Our opinions are always our own.
Publish Date: 8 February 2026 | Last Reviewed: 27 June 2026 | Next Planned Review: 27 December 2027